Patriarchy, Misogyny, and Gender Relations

(By Temidayo Ahanmisi)--It's interesting though seeing die hard misogynists coming out from the woodworks...literarily. Like the craven worms they truly are.

The oodles of comic outrage about the president's "other room" gaffe just makes me want to chuckle and choke someone dead in amusement.

I mean..like...really?

"My wife belongs in my heart, my life, my office..."

"I am a mother, a wife, a career woman. I don't belong in the..."

Aaaah spare me!

Nobody fucking cares. Go suck a lemon...
a d**k, a p***y. No one wants to know what your boring ass does in your home.

And what's all the needling of your favourite toys - " (Facebook) feminists" about?

How much more thick can a people get?

The statement about Buhari's wife from Buhari should matter only to Buhari's wife and perhaps his children at most.

He is a product of Patriarchy. He has obviously never taken time to examine his social culture. So what?

Is he any different from millions of Nigerian men, women and even children who are taught daily, hourly that an ideal woman esteems her kitchen over every other corporate human endeavour?

Have you looked at the social studies and civic education books your primary school age children are inundated with daily at school?

Have you seen the picture of an "ideal home" which of course makes up the ideal society and the ideal nation by consequence?

The missus is in the kitchen. End of.

You cannot come railing at feminists daily on Facebook. You cannot issue from a society which country's highest lawmaking body rejected a proposal to elevate her female members to full human status in in the 21st century. You cannot go into paroxysms of rage, throwing Bible and Quran at any female who as much as demurs at the idea of submission in relationships. You cannot be that person who cusses out "the West" at every turn for the "wantonness" of its women...

...I mean surely you cannot be all of this nabob of reprehensible callowness and not see how you are just a right old idiot for calling out the president for his remarks about his wife...or are you actually criminally stupid to boot???

That was a faux pas alright, but the joke was on the president who was making a case for patronage from a woman in the "immoral West", waiting on her nod...and then trying to school the world on the more sensible functionality of a woman.

Some of you treat your wives like doormats, carry on like demented baboons about women in general; slut shame any woman who crosses you... and you imagine to shame an honest man who very probably engages decently with his wife and daughters?

Are y'all not just edging toward criminality in your stock stupidity?

No be only...

I mean just a few months ago I know 7 out of 10 of you were hailing Adeboye, penning long posts to argue his right to talk smack in his church.

Some of you men secretly stroked your challenged genitals at Pastor Chris' endorsement of your long cherished gender philosophy.

Then you come out with all this...

Aarrrggghh.

Never mind. I'll just drink my coffee and forget I am from the same society with so many varieties of clowns.

PS:

Buhari is in his 70s. He is the product of one of the deeper and most unyielding Patriarchies on the globe.

He had rote education and the joined the military in this same society.

He grew up at a time when the idea of letting female children go to school was a novel concept in perhaps half the country.

He is a devout believer of a religion which incorporates misogyny as sacred tradition and route to the holy and the holistic.

Yet in all this, his daughters schooled and lived outside the confines of home, travelling long miles for education.

His children live and thrive as bonafide 21st century culture adherents even to the displeasure of most purists of shared religious persuasions as them and their father.

His wife travels on her own to far flung countries on visits. She runs her businesses and has her own money.

You, a young man; a young woman in your 20s, 30s, 40s...you are on Amanda Chisom, Nora Oma and Valerian Uju Raphael's pages engaging in endless retrogressive debates:

"Should a man allow his wife go and buy bread from the junction?"

"Should a girl wash her boyfriend's boxers in the same water as her panties?"

"Should a man allow his wife read Mills & Boon?"

"Should a woman be allowed to have her own account?"

"Is it better to a laundry man or to just marry? Please advise me."

"Dear Adviser, my fiance seized my handset. He said he can only let me call his mother and a few of my relatives. I am begging him, but he won't listen.

I love him so much."

"She left me because I beat her small and broke her hand. Why are women so loose nowadays?"

"I won't let my wife be on Facebook because she will join these feminist women."

"A wise woman leaves feminism at the front door."

In 2016 you are beyond primitive. What's your excuse?

And to think that the lot of you are audacious enough to even imagine to mock President Buhari.

Mrs. Buhari commissions Nigerian facilities in Korea. Your wife cannot deputise for you at landlords association meetings because you consider her redundant.

Most of you would cringe in horror at the idea of your wife coming to the gate of your place of business simply because she is a woman and can't be trusted with complex matters.

Buhari is an elder. His generation had to deal with more gender challenges and armed with much less knowledge, vexposure and access to technology.

He is yet more cosmopolitan and refined in gender relations than 90% of you Comments Section louts from Bella Naija to Nairaland; from Sahara Reporters to IgbereTV and Abiyamo.

And you think to upload pictures and memes in mockery?

Shouldn't some of you be slapped?

Seriously.